Norwich South MP Simon Wright steps in while I recover from horrid virus
Apologies for last week's unauthorised absence, although I hear that MP Simon Wright filled my slot, as it were, and they say a change is as good as a rest.
I had intended to write my column, but was overtaken by a dreadful ague, the type that everyone else dismisses as a 'cold', but which I felt at some points was akin to the virus in 28 Days Later.
As I type, I am only just recovering from this devastating blow to my immune system and the ability to mutter or think anything other than self-pitying claptrap about my fight for survival.
I did consider writing an entire column where I repeated the same sentence ('Please.
Send. Help') over and over again, but Simon Wright trumped me with plentiful stories about his constituency work.
On that note, I must thank so many of you for asking me, nay begging me, to come back.
It is with heavy heart, therefore, and still the remains of a heavy head cold, that I must break the news that I am about to desert you yet again.
- 1 Former Norwich restaurant to be transformed into £1.5m food hall
- 2 Family living in city's 'worst' council house despair over new damp
- 3 See inside this 'stunning' £700k family home for sale in a Norwich suburb
- 4 Man refusing to pay rent for council flat over 16-year mould problem
- 5 Norwich City star and fan groups back call for drums at Carrow Road
- 6 Norwich's tiniest pub completes facelift
- 7 Extra security measures approved for flats plagued by drug use
- 8 Graduate outraged after being handed tax bill for unoccupied student digs
- 9 Mum-to-be outraged after yobs vandalise 13 cars in suburb
- 10 'Such a shame': Independent card shop announces closure with sale
Unusually, my illness occurred just before my holiday, rather than on the first day of it (of course, let's not count any chickens – I can, and probably will, still pull something infectious out of the bag, probably attached to a stack of grimy Match Attax trading cards) and so you're just going to have to cope without me for a week.
I shall be enjoying the one week in the year when no one can look at my clothes, inspired by this year's autumn/winter SAS Night Operations Collection, and say: 'Halloween's over, love'.
If I come trick or treating at your door, my sweet of choice is sweet peanuts. Stock up.
•This article was original published on October 24, 2011