October 31 2014 Latest news:
Monday, December 31, 2012
For the first time ever, I can be somewhat smug about the resolutions I made for 2012.
I actually did start exercising – and stuck to it – and I actually did give up some fairly appalling habits which threatened to either kill me or shred what is left of my mental health into windblown tatters.
I say this because my other resolution for 2012 was to be hideously smug and hateful and where better to do it than in a newspaper where I can be hideously smug and hateful to a crowd of thousands rather than my family and the people I haven’t already alienated by my smug hatefulness.
For those of you gearing up to change your lives in 2013, I say only this: I’ve already done it and I probably did it better than you will and my dad can eat more frogs than yours can, so there.
I hope that helps.
As an aside, I wish you all a very happy new year and thank you for your continued support, which is always appreciated and never taken for granted.
(My resolution for 2013 is to be even smarmier than I was in 2012. And I was very smarmy in 2012, so it’s quite a challenge.)