The hell of being a loud-mouthed, pea-brained TV presenter

Alarming news. It seems that a tall bloke wearing badly fitting jeans, whose only talents are rubbishing everything (particularly Norfolk), driving cars too fast and making sweeping generalisations based on long-held misconceptions and prejudices, has been allowed to publish his prattle in a national newspaper and given the impression that someone gives a damn about his opinions. Haemorrhoids Clarkson (Haemorrhy to his fan and mum) has caused a minor ripple on the expat forums and even made it to Gulf News this morning because of his article in the Times about the hell of being an expat. He must have run out of places and people at home at which to poke fun, and presumably no-one cares about posh, fast cars anymore because of the crunchie. The second line of his article reveals that he was really struggling for something to say: "It seems that all the world’s clever people have gone missing." No dimwit, just missing from the UK for a short while; they can be found anywhere else in the world. He goes on to pursue the old stereotype that British expats spend their lives in hot countries sitting at a bar reading the Sun and moaning about the YouKay. Of course we do. That's how I manage to stay employed over here and enjoy a better quality of life than I would if I had continued to work in England. Goodness, it's 9:08 am and I haven't had my first G&T - must dash to buy the Sun. Berk!