Name Theory

Up the Chavs!

My theory of names reflecting that those unfortunates who are saddled at infancy with a moniker which ensures - in a self-fulfilling prophesy kind of way – that they will be blighted in later life has gained credence through the efforts of Alastair McLean, boss of upmarket travel company, Activities Abroad.

In a letter to customers, he delivered a non-PC attack on the residents of, among many other towns, Dewsbury, West Yorkshire.

He asserts that the following people will not be found on one of his company's holidays: Dazza, Britney, Chardonnay, Shannon (shades of Dewsbury!), Candice and others of that ilk.

Apparently, only Johns, Henrys and Annes will be your companions if you choose his travel company.

He was immediately in hot water with the PC brigade.

It is the curse of the prophet to remain unknown in his own country.

What we need is research. For example, in those areas where the 11 plus exam is still in use for gaining entrance to grammar school it should be possible to test my theory. All we need to do is find out the statistical breakdown of all Christian names of the pupils who take the 11 plus in a given year. Then compare the successful pupils with the percentage of Chav names in the population as a whole.

Ok – it's a start.

I'm convinced I'm right. Name you child Antwan or Chablis and you are sentencing them to a life time in a shell suit. Go on, prove me wrong.